Top 10 strange sports scandals

The saying used to be: "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." But as we grow older, that noble maxim mutates to: "If you don't have anything nice to say, meet me at the water cooler."

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16 Things that it took me over 50 years to learn

16 Things that it took me over 50 years to learn:
      by Dave Barry, Nationally Syndicated Columnist

1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a
  laxative on the same night.
2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human
  race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential,
  that word would be "meetings."
3. There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."
4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost
  never want you to share yours with them.
5. You should not confuse your career with your life.
6. Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
  (I wish I had!)
7. Never lick a steak knife. 
8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.
9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and
  compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely
  suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual
baby emerging from her at that moment.
11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people
  to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 21.
12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age,
  gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that,
  deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
13. A person, who is nice to you, but rude to a waiter, is not a
  nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never
  fails.)
14. Your friends love you anyway.
15. Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone
  amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the
Titanic.
16. Thought for the day: Men are like fine wine . They start out
  as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the crap out of them
  until they turn into something acceptable to have dinner with.

FINAL THOUGHT FOR THE DAY: There is more money being spent on
  breast implants and Viagra than on Alzheimer's research. This means
that by 2030, there should be a large elderly population with perky
  boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them

What does Love mean?

A group of professional people posed this question to a group of 4 to 8 year-olds, "What does love mean?"

The answers they got were broader and deeper than anyone could have imagined. See what you think:

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"When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and paint her toenails anymore.

So my grandfather does it for her all the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love."

Rebecca- age 8

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"When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different.

You just know that your name is safe in their mouth."

Billy – age 4

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"Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne and they go out and smell each other."

Karl – age 5

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"Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs."

Chrissy – age 6

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"Love is what makes you smile when you're tired."

Terri – age  4

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"Love is when my mommy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK."    

Danny -  age 7

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"Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more.
My Mommy and Daddy are like that. They look gross when they kiss"

Emily – age 8

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"Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen."   

Bobby – age 7 (Wow!)

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"If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a friend who you hate,"

Nikka – age 6
(we need a few million more Nikka's on this planet)

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"Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it everyday."  

Noelle – age 7

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"Love is like a little old woman and a little old man who are still friends even after they know each other so well."

Tommy – age 6

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"During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and smiling.

He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore."

Cindy – age 8

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"My mommy loves me more than anybody .

You don't see anyone else kissing me to sleep at night."

Clare – age 6

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"Love is when Mommy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken."

Elaine-age 5

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"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he is handsomer than Robert Redford."

Chris – age 7

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"Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him alone all day."

Mary Ann – age 4

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"I know my older sister loves me because she gives me all her old clothes and has to go out and buy new ones." 

Lauren – age 4

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"When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you." (what an image)

Karen – age 7

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"Love is when Mommy sees Daddy on the toilet and she doesn't think it's gross."

Mark – age 6

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"You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget."    

Jessica – age 8

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And the final one — Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked about a contest he was asked to judge.

The purpose of the contest was to find the most caring child.

The winner was a four year old child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had recently lost his wife.

Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just sat there.

When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbor, the little boy said,

"Nothing, I just helped him cry"

3 stubborn PC problems you can fix

You keep getting a Your system is running low on virtual memory message

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A little Syrian boy

A little Syrian boy goes into the kitchen where his mom iscooking.While playing, he wears a "tarboush" and a "sherwal"… and says: "Mom, look, I'm a Lebanese boy now "!!His mom slaps him in the face and says "Go show your father."He goes to his dad in the living room and says, "Look dad, I'm a Lebanese boy." His dad slaps him hard in the face and says, "Go show your grandmother."The boy goes in his grandmother's room and says, "Look, Grandma, I'm aLebanese boy. His grandmother slaps him in the face and sends him back to his mother. His mother says: "See. Did you learn anything from that?" Towhich the boy replies: "Sure I did!! I've only been Lebanese for fiveminutes and I already HATE you Syrians!"